Life happens. We have all heard this saying before. We all know what that means. It means that somewhere along the journey of life, we made an error and are now dealing with the consequences. When we say this we are aware that we are trying to encourage ourselves and find the capacity for self-forgiveness and move past the wrong thing that is now plagues our minds.I am speaking of myself here, as I face myself and the areas where I could have done better. As the new month rolled in, it is almost a natural thing to give retrospective to the events that we’ve experienced, and survived. I am sure we have all been there more times than we care to count. Each one of us has had to navigate through a mess of self destructive thoughts and sometimes it can feel as though you are sinking in a quicksand pit of failure. Let me share a few tip I have learned on moving learned from the battlefield of personal disappointment.
Nobody’s perfect: Yes, not even you! I’m not being harsh, I’m being real. I’m the least perfect of us all. Ask me and I’ll tell you. We often place such high expectations on ourselves that we end up being our own worst critic. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying reject standards altogether. I am saying that as we strive to reach our greatest good we will take a wrong turn every now and then. We will let ourselves down, trust me! I know this all too well. However, if you accept that this is bound to happen then you are less likely to be thrown off when something actually does happen. Take it as part of the journey. Dust yourself off and keep it moving darling!
Make amends: Did your actions hurt someone? Did you cross a line with a colleague or a family member? Or did your actions cost you a great deal of money? Whatever the case, an acknowledgement of the deed and an apology for it has a liberating effect on our spirits that takes the weight of guilt off us and allows us make strides towards improvement. First and foremost, accepting that you have committed a wrong shows maturity on your part, and that can go a long way in the healing process. If a face-to-face apology is a bit too hard for you, then a written note will be as much appreciated as a conversation, and gives the injured party a chance to deal with their feelings before coming to you to have that talk.
Learn From It: Can you take anything positive away from it? Perhaps it was your thinking that needed a change. Or was it a habit, a way of being that was due for a tune up? There is always something to be learned from a slip-up that will lead us to being a better person in the future. This can only happen if we CHOOSE to see the positivity and then to learn from it. This may require a little introspection on your part. And honesty, a lot of it. You will have to turn the camera on yourself and decide what it is about yourself that needs to change. This may be a bit difficult to do, because lets be real, no one wants to admit that they are the bad one. But for the sake of progress and self improvement it must be done.
Let It Go: Sounds simple enough right? Let me tell you, from my own personal struggles, this is not as clean cut as it sounds. Letting go means to leave the past in the past. Let the deed remain where it is and don’t allow it to occupy the present through continuously revisiting it in your mind and reliving the episode over and over. This does you no good. Whenever the memory tries to resurface, reject it; deliberately. Refuse to dwell on a recollection that only brings your mood down and reverses your progress. Choose instead to focus on the good that has happened since then. Have you quit that habit? Have you learned to control your temper? Did the incident mend a friendship, or even end one that was not beneficial to you? Let the good that came from it take a place of prominence in your mind. Whatever you can do to let the negativity go, do that.
Love Yourself Again: You are a good person. Yes, you did something that made you question yourself. This tends to happen from time to time. But one wrong move doesn’t make you a bad person. You are still a wonderful creation, a valuable and precious human being with a wealth of good to share with the world. Remind yourself of the good person that lives inside of you and embrace that man or woman with unrepentant totality. You are still allowed to smile, and you are still allowed to believe in yourself. There is absolutely nothing wrong with loving yourself. Believe in the treasure that you are. Life will try and knock you down, don’t let it. You’ve got this!
You Are Born Extraordinary!